“Who told you that?” “Nobody told me, but I overheard it.” “Where did you overhear it?” “Years ago.
I was with the Philadelphia Institute expedition in the Bad Lands under Professor Cope, hunting mastodon bones, and I 42 overheard him say, his own self, that any plantigrade circumflex vertebrate bacterium that hadn’t wings and was uncertain was a reptile.
Well, then, has this dog any wings? No.
Is he a plantigrade circumflex vertebrate bacterium? Maybe so, maybe not; but without ever having seen him, and judging only by his illegal and spectacular parentage, I will bet the odds of a bale of hay to a bran mash that he looks it.
Finally, is he uncertain? That is the point–is he uncertain? I will leave it to you if you have ever heard of a more uncertainer dog than what this one is?” “No, I never have.” “Well, then, he’s a reptile.
That’s settled.” “Why, look here, whatsyourname” “Last alias, Mongrel.” “A good one, too.
I was going to say, you are better educated than you have been pretending to be.
I like cultured society, and I shall cultivate your acquaintance.
Now as to Shekels, whenever you want to know about any private thing that is going on at this post or in White Cloud’s camp or Thunder-Bird’s, he can tell you; and if you make friends with him he’ll be glad to, for he is a born gossip, and picks up all the tittle-tattle.
Being the whole Seventh Cavalry’s reptile, he doesn’t belong to anybody in 43 particular, and hasn’t any military duties; so he comes and goes as he pleases, and is popular with all the house cats and other authentic sources of private information.
He understands all the languages, and talks them all, too.
With an accent like gritting your teeth, it is true, and with a grammar that is no improvement on blasphemy–still, with practice you get at the meat of what he says, and it serves. . .
Hark! That’s the reveille. . . . [THE REVEILLE]
Read more about Bran Mash : Is he a plantigrade circumflex vertebrate bacterium Maybe so maybe….: